Are you feeling like “Blancmange,” beautifully moulded on the outside, but lacking substance and resilience on the inside?

In this episode of the Healing Practice podcast, we explore the essence of cultivating the “new you” during the transition of perimenopause and menopause. For many women, this stage feels like being pushed to an impasse where “managing” is no longer enough. We discuss how to empty a full head of external demands to create a vital niche for your own renewal.

We dive into the heart of womanhood and the reclamation of self, including:

  • The “Small Death” of the Old Self: Why moving into a fresh phase of life requires risking the “death” of old habits and identities to make room for renewal.
  • The Blancmange Effect: Recognising the depletion cycle where you look “amazing” to the world but feel crushed and hollowed out by repeated stress.
  • Inner-Directed Living: Shifting from being a “yes person” driven by external reactions to a woman who checks in with her own intuitive, knowing space.
  • Part-Time Personalities: How to identify and say “no” to the internal voices of “Miss Perfect” or the “Resentful Capable Woman” that drive you to burnout.

Setting Your Own Stage

Instead of running on empty, it is time to set an intentional stage for your life with you in charge. This involves asserting sovereignty over your own well-being and orchestrating a “new show” where your needs are no longer backstage.

The Art of the “Check-In”

Reconnecting with yourself starts with simple, mindful acts. Whether making a cup of coffee or taking a walk, the goal is to slow down and notice the dialogue between your internal state and the external world. By staying present in one thing at a time, you begin to restore the substance that depletion has taken away.

Practical Steps for the Journey

  • Nervous System Regulation: When you reach “panic stations,” use the breath to capture the moment. Inhale, hold for a few seconds to “catch” the panic, and let it go to restore your calm.
  • Claim Non-Negotiable Time: Set a clear boundary for yourself. Be specific, rather than a vague 30 minutes, decide on a walk or a specific restful activity.
  • Give Yourself Permission: Shift your language from “claiming time back” to “giving myself permission.” You aren’t asking for it; you are stating it as a fact of your own self-care.
  • Silence the Inner Critic: Talk back to the judgment that says you “should” be able to do it all. Replace judgment with the same loving-kindness you would offer a child.

Reflection Points

  • When you look at your “mold” from the outside, is there substance and energy on the inside, or are you feeling like Blancmange?
  • What “small deaths” of old roles or habits are you resisting that might be preventing your renewal?
  • Can you identify which “part-time personality” (the Perfectionist, the Yes-Person) is currently running your schedule?

Explore More at The Healing Practice

If you are ready to take charge and move beyond the depletion cycle, we invite you to explore resources tailored to the heart of womanhood.

  • Visit Our Website: Access information on navigating perimenopause with intention and self-care at thehealingpractice.com.au
  • Podcast & Workshops: Learn more about nervous system regulation and boundary setting through our dedicated podcast episodes and workshops
  • Empowerment Tools: Find the guidance you need to move from “managing” to truly thriving in your sovereign self

Highlights

  • 00:00 Cultivating the “new you” in menopause
  • 02:20 Embracing the “small death” necessary for renewal
  • 04:00 Feeling like Blancmange: Looking good but feeling hollow
  • 06:50 The Heart of Womanhood: Connecting with your intuitive centre
  • 08:45 Mindful Coffee: A simple practice for inner-direction
  • 10:20 Nervous system regulation for panic moments
  • 11:55 Identifying your “part-time personalities”
  • 13:30 Setting boundaries and claiming non-negotiable time
  • 14:45 Treating yourself with the compassion you give a child